Find your Locus of Control
See where you sit on the locus of control spectrum. Go to the wellbeing article (see below) and follow the link to Rotter’s original questionnaire. There are 13 sets of statements. Pick the statement that resonates with you the most. If neither seems right decide which doesn’t fit and chose the other. (The link asks for a name to personalise your score but no other information or verification is required)
To move your locus of control towards the internal end of the spectrum:
1. Be aware of what you can and cannot control. Factors you cannot control are your limitations and energy spent trying to change them is wasted.
2. Recognise that you are fully in control of all of your thoughts feelings and behaviours. No one has the power to affect your emotions unless you choose to let them.
If someone is rude, they are rude.
You decide how to respond.
You can even choose whether it affects you or not.
No one has the power to make you angry, upset or confrontational unless you give it to them.
Take responsibility for all your responses.
3. Reframe negative responses. When you notice a negative response in yourself; this may be physical – a sick feeling in your stomach a tight chest or palpitations; or a thought - I’m not good enough, I have failed. Stop and take a moment to examine that response. Ask yourself:
Why has this response been triggered?
Is my response appropriate?
Is my response helpful?
Is there a different response that would be more appropriate, more useful?
4. Have a ‘Resilience Toolkit’, a host of tools and techniques that help you to live more mindfully. The ‘Our Resilience Tools’ Page on the website is a good place to start.